For the second time...

Two times now I've had to watch my daughter pack her things and stood by as her boyfriend and strangers came and took her away from home. It's a sad day. The song "Orphan" by the Newsboys popped up on my blog when I opened it up and it made me cry. This is the part that got to me...

"the dying mother weaving bulrushes

along the Nile
float her basket over the sea

here on a barren shore

we'll be waiting for

a tailwind to carry her orphan's cry

don't you worry, child

I wrote a lullaby"

I let her go in faith knowing that God will care for her and my lullaby is my prayer for her. We have said all we know to say and Annika has been instructed in what is right and wrong, yet she recognizes herself that she wants her own way. Basically this is called rebellion. She talks about marrying Chase sometime in the future. I believe she feels that doing so will make everything "right". I'm glad she wants to make a commitment, but I'm more concerned about her eternal soul - not her happiness here. She is living for her own self gratification. She is living to satisfy her flesh. Marriage won't change that.

"Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions, envying, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these, of which I forewarn you, just as I have forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God."

Loy asked her if she believed in God last night. She said she did but she just wants to do what she wants to do. This is evil in the sight of God. Why is it evil? Because it is rebellion against Him. He has told us in His Word there are things that we should not do. These are the very things Christ died on the cross to redeem us from! How can someone say they believe in God and they LOVE God and then live in a sexual relationship with someone they are not married to?

"Why do you call Me, 'Lord, Lord' and do not do what I say? Everyone who comes to Me and hears My words and acts on them, I will show you whom he is like: he is like a man building a house, who dug deep and laid a foundation on the rock; and when a flood occurred, the torrent burst against that house and could not shake it, because it had been well built. But the one who has heard and has not acted accordingly, is like a man who built a house on the ground without any foundation; and the torrent burst against it and immediately it collapsed, and the ruin of that house was great." Luke 6:46-49

And, "If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word; and My Father will love him, and We will come to him and make Our abode with him. He who does not love Me does not keep My words; and the word which you hear is not Mine, but the Father's who sent Me." John 14:23-24

And, "If you love Me, you will keep My commandments." John 14 :15

This morning she came upstairs when Loy was reading devotions to me. She even sat down and listened. Loy read Proverbs 29. The first sentence in Proverbs 29 was this...

"A man who hardens his neck after much reproof will suddenly be broken beyond remedy."

She heard this. I wonder what it will take (and who will have to suffer) for her to repent and follow the Lord. I'm not saying these things to be judgmental. I also was sexually immoral with Loy when I was a teenager. I'm just saying them because it is the truth and I would have no greater joy than to see my kids walk in the truth. I fully expect people who do not claim to believe or love God to be sexually immoral. That is their nature and they do not know another way because they are slaves to their flesh. But, when you accept Jesus through faith and believe and say you "love" Him, you are a new person with a new nature and that nature desires to know what God desires of you and it desires to obey God's ways, trusting that all His ways are loving and for your good. Maybe my daughter believes but she does not love God. I guess selfishly (because I'm very imperfect) it bugs me when people say they love God but don't care or try to do what He says. Or maybe it's not selfish, maybe I'm jealous for God. It hurts me to see people walk around and say, "I believe", "I love", Blah, blah, blah.... Yet they do not attempt to obey or follow Him. Furthermore, they turn on the person who points out to them the fact that they are saying one thing but doing another. If you say you believe and love God and want to follow Him yet you do not have His spirit convicting you of sin (sexual immorality is one of many sins that comes from our flesh) than something is terribly wrong. You should examine yourself to see whether you are really in the faith...

Consider this carefully, 1 Corinthians 13:5, "Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Jesus Christ is in you- unless, of course, you fail the test?"

Think about it. If you have Jesus Christ in you, would you go on in sexual immorality? Don't you think Jesus would convict your heart of sin and guide you to His righteousness and help you obey Him? As I mentioned earlier, sexual immorality is only one sin, but it is a popular one with the flesh we live in - probably because it is pleasurable. There is also lying and hating and jealousy and putting things before God (idolatry). There is not doing what God says in all things because you want to do what you want to do (outright rebellion). There is also NOT doing the things He wants you to do like forgiving someone when they have offended you, like humbling yourself and obeying Him when He calls you to repentance. Like sacrificing your desires to love and care for another. If you love Him, read His Word and put some action with the faith you claim you have. STOP doing the things He said His followers should have no part of and START doing the things He instructs us to do throughout the Bible. For those of you who say you love Him and believe but are living a sexually immoral life, consider these instructions from God...

1 Thessalonians 4:1-8:

"Finally brothers, we instructed you how to live in order to please God, as in fact you are living. Now we ask you and urge you in the Lord Jesus to do this more and more. For you know what instructions we gave you by the authority of the Lord Jesus. IT IS GOD'S WILL THAT YOU SHOULD BE SANCTIFIED: THAT YOU SHOULD AVOID SEXUAL IMMORALITY; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; and in that matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God who gives you His Holy Spirit. "

Do you really want to reject God?

Titus 2:11-14

"For the Grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men. It teaches us to say "No" to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age, while we wait for the blessed hope - the glorious appearing of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ, who gave Himself to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for Himself a people that are His very own eager to do what is good."

Are you saved? Do you have this grace? Do you say "NO!" to ungodliness?

Dangerious Waterfalls and Lazer Tag

I'm feeling very disturbed. If the outcome of the things I care about were up to me, I would be so full of anxiety right now that I wouldn't be able to breathe. I know that God is in control and I must simply obey Him, step by step, in spite of the fact that I feel like the task at hand is so complex and in need of skill (like brain surgery) and I feel like I'm just a preschooler who can't even read or write. This morning I heard about things with two different families that are headed into danger. I want to scream a warning, but would they listen? That's the whole thing... They have no reason to listen to me. I feel like they are on a raft floating toward a waterfall and I desire to warn them of the impending doom. The problem: it's not up to me to rescue them. Only God can show them there is danger ahead. I guess I need to just start with praying for them. This is hard because the danger ahead is devastating and people WILL be hurt. This is hard because I desire to DOOOO something. "Lord, I care about these families and I love them. Open their eyes and rescue them and spare them from the destruction ahead of them if they do not turn to you. Make them very aware of their own pride so that they can humbly follow you and fear you and walk in wisdom. In Jesus name stop them from approaching the waterfall where there is death and destruction." It's hard to comprehend that God may want some to go over the waterfall for His good reasons. I know He has allowed me to fall over some and it has all been for good in my life and for His glory. He really is AWESOME! Psalm 42 is the psalm God directed me to over and over when I was falling over various waterfalls in my life. "Deep calls to deep at the sound of your waterfalls, All your breakers and Your waves have rolled over me. The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime; And His song will be with me in the night, A prayer to the God of my life.......Hope in God, for I will yet praise Him, The help of my countenance and my God." For now I will just pray.

Last night we celebrated David's birthday with the whole family. We took the boys (David, Joey, Tyler, Jed, and Forest) to a laser tag place. I was worried they would think it was stupid. I was so glad that when I picked them up all they did was talk and talk about how fun it was and that they wanted to go back the next day. I hope they both (David and Joey) had good birthdays this year. They have hard roads ahead of them and I'm happy to be able to give them good memories now. The following pictures are the best I could get of teenage boys. The one where they are all looking at the camera but not all of them are smiling - I had to demand that I get at least ONE picture of them all looking at the camera!

I got a smile! Yeah!!!

Birthdays are fun.

In the van on the way to laser tag.

Hiding from the camera.

This is the picture Loy tried to take of the boys. David wasn't even in the picture and, well, just look!

This is the picture I forced the boys to let me take of them. From left to right, Jed (not smiling), Forest, Tyler, Joey (not smiling) and David (not smiling).

And last but not least the Birthday song, er, dirge.

My incision is all healed, finally! I have been very busy driving kids everywhere and trying to get the house back to normal. The tile is half way done. It looks good. I'm going to read my book "Ida" and go to bed. Goodnight.

We had another "summer" dinner tonight. I even got corn on the cob.

Here is a sneak peek of the tile. What do you think of the tile on the tub with the tile on the floor? Does it clash?


Did I ever tell you my kitty can fly?

This is my new "grandma" purse. I got it from Salvation Army, of course! It smells like cigarette smoke, though. I've been trying to get the smell out. I sprayed it with fabreeze, sprayed it with vanilla body spray, washed the outside of it with a Clorox wipe, and put a bar of dove soap in it. My friend Jennifer gave me a little sachet of lavender to put in it, too, so now it has a bar of soap and a lavender sachet in it. I hope the smell will fade away eventually because it is so cute. I love the rhinestones on it. And it's pink - my favorite color!

It's been windy! These are pictures of my neighborhood.

Fences are blown over everywhere....

another fence down....

another fence down...

and another one...

Did I say it's been windy??

Really windy!

Trees are falling over everywhere bringing up the roots with them too.

Same tree different angle.

These huge trees line the street to our house. I'm glad we weren't driving by at the time this one fell.

This one took the sidewalk up with it.

This is so sad. This is a beautiful, old Portland style house that everyone admires across from the college. A tree took out the entire front porch. It also looks like the house has some damage.

More trees down.

This tree held it's ground but the wind won the battle.

This is my neighbor's house. Look at the top right side of his roof. We have shingles all over our yard from this house and others.

This is an old apple tree.

Happy Birthday Joey!

My baby is 14

This was the best smile I could get out of him.

Myeah, Myeah (as Ben calls me) and Papa. This was the night of silly face pictures...

Julia's silly face... Laura too...

Annika's silly face...

Ben and Laura's silly face...

Shellee's silly face...

A all the kids loving on Isaac

This is a neat picture! Shellee caught my flash! It looks like she is holding a star.

Joey's silly face...

Adam's silly face.

Banana cream pie.

The traditional family birthday song... We all need singing lessons!

Blessings and Humility

I went to Salvation Army today to look for two things. I've been looking for a dresser for my nephew and a full size box spring for Annika. Guess what... They had them both! The box spring was only $30.00!!! The dresser was only $40.00!!! That was the blessing. Then... I went to pay for the items and I was asked "AGAIN" (this is the third time now) if I qualify for the SENIOR DISCOUNT!!!!!! GURRRRRH!!! That was the humbling thing! What is it with me? Do I really look that old! I'm only 40! Yes, I have gray hair, but, come on! Do I look 60? I took a shower today but I didn't wash my hair or put on any makeup. I took a picture of myself so you could see what I looked like. DO I REALLY LOOK 60?!!!!

OK, I do have gray hair, and I do have a mustache, and I have a big Ol' zit on my chin, and I do have a bunch of wrinkles. Sheesh, come on now, 60 year old ladies don't get ZITS!!! Do they?

NO infection, NO claw foot tub, and NO marble.

I went to my post-op appointment today. Everything seems all right. I don't have an infection. I had a suture that was irritating me. I had the surgery done at OHSU (which is a learning hospital) so the Doctor had a student with him today. He asked her to cut the suture! I was a little worried at first because she looked nervous. She had to pick the suture up with tweezers and PULL it out a little and snip it. Then she PULLED each side a little and snipped it off. OUCH!! She did a good job. It did hurt a little, though. I love my doctor. His name is Dr. David Lee and he is so nice and makes me feel so comfortable. I was so scared the first time we met him because I thought he would take one look at me and tell me, "Oh, no,no,no,... I can't help you, you're WAY too old and you're too fat, too. Sorry... NEXT!..." He was so nice though. He never made me feel old or fat! I made him work hard, too (my surgery was six hours long!). Dr. Lee told me my incision should heal closed and it should feel better soon without that suture irritating me. If anyone is wanting a tubal reversal, I recommend Dr. David Lee at OHSU. http://www.fertilityoregon.com/clinic/staff.htm

Now for the next news. I went out with Jennifer yesterday and looked at tile and the claw foot tub. I found marble tile at Home Depot. It was only about $5.00 per square foot. We also found a few other tiles to consider. We looked at the tub at Lowes and I sat in it. I couldn't put my legs straight out in a sitting position so I wasn't sure if this tub would be good for us even though it looked so wonderful with my eyes. I brought some tile home and after talking a lot with Jennifer about it, and talking to Loy about it, and then praying about it, and then crying about it. Yes, I said crying! I know it's stupid. I was upset with myself because I felt like I couldn't make a decision. Jennifer told me practical things about tile and marble, and Loy told me I need to make the decision because he really had no preference. I don't know what I want. Well, I do know what I want but, what I want may not be the best decision! The tub really is not comfortable. You would have to be a 10 year old to enjoy a bath in it. But the tub is SOOO cute. It's just the look I have always wanted. I couldn't choose another claw foot tub because they are all too expensive and they don't come with the plumbing which can cost as much as the tub does! The tub I was looking at cost less than the least expensive new or refurbished claw foot tub AND it came With the plumbing. BUT, there was obviously a reason for this. IT'S FOR MIDGETS!!! or "little people" if you are the politically correct type. I can't believe myself but, I actually tried to reason with myself about how it might be OK... I don't really take baths very often.... Yeah, I know ... stupid. I slept on it and the next morning I made the decision, I decided not to get the claw foot tub, Look how lovely it is though http://www.lowes.com/lowes/lkn?action=productDetail&productId=178918-31356-P7-CT1B&lpage=none.

We are going to replace the whirlpool tub that's broken with a soaking tub. I don't want another whirlpool tub to clean and possibly have it break on us or leak again. I think ours was broken when we moved in this house and I think the previous owners knew it, too. As for the tile, Jennifer told me marble is a soft natural stone so it can easily scratch and chip. It's also slippery when wet. I decided the marble was not a good choice for us since we have cats, kids, and a dog. All the other tile I picked out to test didn't look good but there was one that looked alright with the counter tile and tub tile so I picked that one. It has a marble look but the color has more cream than white and grey in it. I hope it will look good when it's done. Jennifer said designers often pick different shades, rather than trying to match everything, to give rooms contrast and interest. We'll see how it turns out. I will miss my carpet that's in there because it is really pretty but tile is much better for a bathroom. I took before pictures and I'll post the before and after pictures when it is all done.

This is why I don't want to replace the tub and counter tile. I really like this tile!

Isn't it pretty? Do you think the tile I picked will look good with this?

This is the tile I picked

The tile on the left is a fake marble. I didn't like it for two reasons. It was not a good color and it was slicker than snot even with dry bare feet! The tile on the right is the real marble. Nice huh? Not a good choice for us though. Also, Phil and Jen said Home Depot doesn't pay attention to the lot number so you can get cases from dark to light and they don't match. It didn't matter though because I had already chosen not to go with the marble.

Broken whirlpool tubs are a good storage place for guitars and a wonderful breeding ground for dust bunnies!

We went to church today. We really like our new church. Every week the elders invite people up who want to be prayed for. Loy wanted me to go up for them to pray for healing for my incision. The elders stand off to the side toward the front and you walk up there and ask for prayer. We went up and Loy asked them to pray and they prayed and when they were done praying, one of the elders went to give Loy a hug and Loy reached around to hug him... and he smacked me right in the face! It didn't hurt but it sent my head back and my hair flying and made a big scene because we all laughed. I was really tired today and took a nap. I have some new problem, my back started hurting last night (different than It's been hurting). If I move just right, it hurts so bad I can't even move for a minute. I've been trying to figure out if it's my muscles or my spine or what. It feels like when I have had a knuckle I'm trying to crack and it hurts really bad, but once I crack the knuckle, it feels great. That's how my back feels and I tried to crack it, but it's not helping. I figured out its not my muscles or my bones, I think it's the tendons because my sternum hurts too, a little. I had this once before in my sternum and twice in my wrists and ankles but not in my back. I am falling apart! With my back, my incision hurting, and my gray hair filling in all over, I'm walking around feeling and looking like an old lady! And my husband is smacking me around at church, too!! LOL!!

David came to Loy tonight around 5:00 pm and announced that at 7:00 pm he needs to do some school work. It's Sunday and he is waiting 'til the last minute! He is so funny that he is so particular that at "7:00 pm" he will do it. At least HE thought of it and wants to do it I guess.

Reading that book "Ida" is making me feel guilty about my life. I live like a queen. I live in a palace. I have "servants" who hunt for my food and prepare it for me to cook. I have "servants" who wash my dishes and wash my laundry. I don't have to store up for winter lest I die. I wouldn't have survived pioneer days. I'm too much of a wimp. Two of my children surely would have died from their asthma and I would have been widowed last year when Loy got the kidney stones that caused a problem with his intestines! I would have been a 40 year old widow with three children and no grandchildren! Their life was about survival and many placed their faith in God because they learned at an early age that they were not in control of things and were at the mercy of a good and loving God who created them. I am so thankful God has made me weak so I have to depend on Him even though I live like a queen. I have learned He loves me and I can trust Him because He is good.

I have nothing to complain about.

I am annoyed that I'm not all healed yet. I asked Loy to pray for me about my attitude about not being healed rather than for healing, today. I realized it was causing me fear and anxiety. We've prayed a lot through this recovery time, so rather than focusing on my body, I'm going to focus on my attitude and trust God. I rested all day today and read the book "Ida". OH, my Gosh! That book had made me cry several times today. It is about a pioneer woman and her life. I can't put it down.

We decided to finally fix our tub in the master bathroom. When we first moved into this house four years ago, I cleaned it out really well. I filled it several times and let the jets run and the kids came up and told me water was leaking through the ceiling in Valarie's room! Sure enough water was pouring out the light fixture and all over her floor from my tub which is upstairs right above her old room. We didn't want to spend the money to fix it then so we just left it and the tub became a storage place for my guitars. My friend Jennifer and her husband Phil do tile work for a living, so... we asked them to do our bathroom for us. Lord willing, we will tile the whole bathroom, the closet, and the little toilet/shower room. We are going to pull out the jet tub and put a claw foot tub in its place. It is very exciting! I have always loved old things so I love the look of a claw foot tub. My dream would be to have marble tile on the floors. But that is way too expensive, so I'm hoping to find some tile that looks like marble. I know they have some because the tile on the jet tub and counter tops in the bathroom is fake marble tile. If I can't find it, I will go with a stone, "Roman bath" look. I love "feathering my nest" so I'm looking forward to this. Also, I can't wait to take a bath!

30, 30, 30, Day 30!!!! Tubal Reversal Surgery Recovery Day 30

Well, I should be recovered, but it looks like I'll be going for a six week recovery rather than a four week recovery. My incision is really bothering me on the two open spots. I'm really looking forward to the appointment to make sure everything is OK.

I spent the day with my friends Julie, Jennifer, and Marian. It was Marian's birthday. Julie made a delicious German chocolate cake and fajitas for lunch. I was so tired when I got home, I had to lay down for about an hour. Then I had to get up and take Annika on errands, get pizza, and pick up Daniel and Laura for Family Night. We made cookies from left over cookie dough I had in the refrigerator from Christmas. I'm surprised - they were still really good! We talked about babies, collector coins, guns, and conspiracy theories among other things. Shellee made a tin foil hat for us conspiracy theorists.

I'm going to take a shower and go to BED! I started reading ANOTHER book called "Ida" that my friends are passing around so I'll read some of that and ignore the 4 other books I'm in the middle of reading. Good night!

Happy Birthday Marian!

The wonderful German Chocolate cake Julie made.

Coffee with whip cream in the cute new cups Julie got from her sister.

Jennifer, Me, Marian, Julie.

From left to right, Annika, Shellee, Laura with Isaac, and Julia on Family Night.

Shellee about to spank Daniel. Everyone should have an Aunt Shellee!

Adam playing with Ben.

Laura with her littlest man Isaac.

Julia and Adam

Adam coloring with the girls wearing a blue sparkly clip in his hair. Everyone should have an Uncle Adam!

Me with the tin foil hat Shellee awarded me after talking about how Alex Jones from "Info Wars" and "Prison Planet" believes 911 was an inside job, old jails being turned into "concentration camps" for when the US rounds up the people some day, and black helicopters.

Tubal Reversal Surgery Recovery Day 29

Psalm 42

I'm only posting because I stubbornly wanted to post 30 days straight! I have one more day! I'm super tired and I don't have much to say. I feel good, but still not back to normal, energy wise. I still have the darn spots where my incision is not completely closed up and healed.

I had a huge disappointment today that really depressed me but I turned to the Lord and read a devotion and His Word and He encouraged me and lifted my head and reminded me to trust Him and reminded me that everything always works out for the good so I don't need to fret or fear. God is with me and He is the lifter of my head. He cares for me. I love Him and I would have no hope if I did not know Him.

Tubal Reversal Surgery Recovery Day 28

Today is 4 weeks since my surgery. I'm now free to resume certain activities if you know what I mean! The two spots are still there. They always look OK in the morning but once I start moving they start to do their gross thing and are sore. I don't think it is infected though. I'm going to try another day without ibuprofen if I can. I'm also going to rest today which means this will probably be a longer blog post because I have the time to sit around and blog.

I really wore myself out the last two days. Loy has been so helpful. I'm even starting to feel useless and threatened kind of. If he can do all this, what am I useful for? What's my value if he doesn't really need me because he is capable of doing everything on his own! LOL! I'll post a picture of his list, and it's just for the morning! He is getting up at 6:30 Am to wake up David for school and start on the morning list (he's been driving David to school, too, because he wants to have more time to interact with David before he leaves the house for school). He told me for now he wants me to stay in bed until about 8:00 am because he thinks I need the sleep. He's right. I've been feeling awkward when I hear him making coffee and talking to David in the morning (when I'm supposed to be sleeping) because I think about the woman in Proverbs 31 who rises early in the morning to take care of her household and I feel like he shouldn't be doing this, I should be doing it! I've been having bizarre dreams during that hour and a half of extra sleep, too. Monday I dreamt that I cut off my feet but I saved them just in case I wanted to put them back on! Isn't that awful?! Today I dreamt all sorts of stressful things. Like Benjamin ran away from me and he was too fast for me to catch and he almost ran into traffic but turned really quick only to fall face forward into an aloe vera plant that was like a cactus and got all the barbs stuck all over his chest and arms and I was so worried about him and thought the barbs were poisonous and Loy was just sleeping and not worried like me! Also, I dreamt that two plump ladies were wearing pink, fluffy taekwondo outfits and wrestling and fell into a pool filled with old, green, murky water. They were drowning and nobody would help them. Finally one guy jumped in, but they were so heavy that he couldn't bring them up. I was waiting for him to get them up so I could do CPR. I woke up at that point and tried to finish the dream in my imagination (does anyone else ever do that?). I imagined the guy pulling one lady out and I started CPR, but I don't know how to do it so I thought two puffs of air were good and seven heart compressions were good. As I was giving the first lady CPR, the guy brought up the second lady and I had to help him get her out of the water and I told him to do CPR on her. He said, "I don't know how!" I yelled at him, "Neither do I!! Just copy me!" So there we were giving CPR and I guess I felt they would make it because I stopped imagining the end and got up. WEIRD, huh? I told Loy about it and he told me CPR is 2 puffs of air and 15 heart compressions. I hope I don't ever need to know that but it's good to know just in case! I wonder why I'm having all these stressful, anxious dreams. I usually don't dream very much at all.

Loy read a really good devotion from "Streams in the Desert" to me today. Here it is I hope it encourages you as it did me.

A story is told of a King who went to his garden one morning, only to find everything withered and dying. He asked the oak tree that stood near the gate what the trouble was. The oak said it was tired of life and determined to die because it was not tall and beautiful like the pine tree. The pine was troubled because it could not bear grapes like the grapevine. The grapevine was determined to throw it's life away because it could not stand erect and produce fruit as large as peaches. The geranium was fretting because it was not tall and fragrant like the lilac. And so it went throughout the garden. Yet coming to a violet, the King found it's face as bright and happy as ever and said, "Well, violet, I'm glad to find one brave little flower in the midst of all this discouragement. You don't seem to be the least disheartened." The violet responded, "No, I'm not. I know I'm small, yet I thought if you wanted an oak or a pine or a peach tree or even a lilac, you would have planted one. Since I knew you wanted a violet, I'm determined to be the best little violet I can be."

Others may do greater work,

but you have your part to do;

And no one in all Gods family

Can do it as well as you.

I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. - Philippians 4:11

Personally, I'm still learning this!

I am so thankful that God gave us the Bible (His Word) to guide us and instruct us on HOW to do the work He has planned for us. Without it we would be in the dark. Without it we would have no hope. Without it there would be no life or growth just a stagnant, murky, old pool like in my dream. Jesus is the living Word and He is my Teacher and Counselor and Rescuer and Savior.

2 Timothy 3:16-17 All scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work.

I am also thankful that the Lord Jesus sent the Holy Spirit to help me live this life. I am not left alone here. I have the Creator of the Universe's written Word and also His Spirit dwelling within me. The Holy Spirit reminds me of the things I have read in the Bible and comforts me when I am sad, encourages me when I feel I can't go on, and teaches me when I don't understand something. And, best of all, His Spirit softens my hard, rebellious heart and convicts me of my sin. Oh, if it were not for Him keeping me, I would so quickly wander away.

Tubal Reversal Recovery Day 27

Long, hard day today! I felt pretty good physically when I woke up this morning, so I decided to try not taking any ibuprofen. I lasted all day until 6:00 pm! I was really needing it at 4:00 pm but wasn't home to take any. I mostly had an achy back. The clinic called me and I have an appointment for the post-op, so that's good. I still have those two spots that won't heal up. Otherwise, I feel good. I had some battles with THE TEENAGER today. I prayed all day long for help from the Lord. He helped me all day with everything. With decisions, with strength, with courage, with wisdom, and with my emotions. It's bedtime and I made it through the day. God is so good to me. He can definitely be trusted when He says to humble yourself and He will lift you up. He is my ever present help in my time of need, which is all the time, all day long!! Bed time, and His mercies are new to me tomorrow morning. Goodnight.

Tubal Reversal Surgery Recovery Day 26

I knew it would come to this. It's 11:17 pm and I'm just now getting a chance to blog. Today Loy went to work and the boys went to school. I spent the whole day making appointments, driving three different kids to the places they needed to go, grocery shopping, getting the tire fixed on the van, etc., etc., etc.... I did call for my post-op appointment and they put me through to an answering machine. I'm supposed to wait for them to call me back. I'll call them again tomorrow. I now have two spots right next to each other that are not healing the way the rest of my incision has healed so I need them to look at it. I made it through the day feeling strong and not too sore. I'm just tired and want to lie down. I still need ibuprofen but I can go 7 hours now in the daytime and 10 over night. Seems like things are getting back to normal real quick now.

Tubal Reversal Surgery Recovery Day 25

Last night I went for a walk with Loy around the neighborhood at 7:30 pm. It was cold and dark. We like night walks - they're fun. The house always feels so toasty warm when you walk inside from a night walk. This morning when I woke up I felt like I lifted weights and had a workout the night before but all I did was go for a little walk! I am so out of shape!

I still have the spot that is bothering me on my incision. It looked good the first half of the day but it looks and feels sore again. I'm calling tomorrow for an appointment. I went 7 hours between doses of ibuprofen the last two times. I feel like I'm just beginning to get back to feeling normal. The boys start school tomorrow, maybe. We got some surprise snow today after church. Laura came over to do some laundry but we had to bring her home early because of the snow. On our way home we almost got in an accident. We were sliding all over the place. Loy saved us though and got the van under control. He wants me to thank the Lord but I thank them both! If the snow doesn't melt the boys may not go to school. I love the snow, but I don't have to drive in it.

We sang this song in Church today. It expresses how I'm feeling.

"I'm Calling Out."

When this world is filled with change

And so much I can't explain

From the peaks of joy to the valleys of pain

Your faithfulness remains

Your faithfulness remains

So I'm calling out to You who called me

I'm holding on to You who holds me

I'm seeking You who came and sought me in my sin

And You've been faithful again and again

So I'm calling out.

When my strength is dry and drained

And my hope begins to wane

You are always near to lift me again

Your faithfulness remains

Your faithfulness remains

Well, since I don't have any pictures for today I'll post some of my thrift store finds.

This is a needlepoint pillow I got at Salvation Army for $1.99 If you wanted to buy one like this new the cheapest I've seen is $35.00.

This wool rug under my coffee table was $15.00 from Goodwill. The cats have puked on it about three times now. The coffee table with the glass top was from Salvation Army I can't remember the exact price but I believe it was between $10.00 and $20.00. I do remember it was disgusting when I bought it - I can't even believe I bought it! I had to wash it about 4 or 5 times. It smelled like someone fed their dogs on it and the glass was all slimy like dog saliva. I saw the good in it though. After some elbow grease and disinfectant, I was glad I got it. I want to paint it shabby chic white but I just haven't had the time.

This was a fun find. It was not something I really wanted but I saw it and I could tell it was old and probably worth something so I took a chance and bought it. I looked it up online and they sell for $60.00 - $100.00 and I got it for....

$4.99!!!

Tubal Reversal Surgery Recovery Day 24

I'm tired of talking about my surgery. I'm doing fine. I have that one spot that won't heal. It hurts a little. I went about 10 hours last night without needing to take ibuprofen. I took some at 11:30pm and I didn't wake up all night needing it. I took the morning dose at 10:00 am! That's a first since the surgery. I'm hurting on the side that has the spot that is bothering me. I also think I have PMS! I've had anxiety all day and for no reason! I'm just feeling irritable and emotional. I spent hours trying to list some things on eBay today only to get to the end to find out that you HAVE to have pay pal to do eBay now. UURRRGGGHHH! I felt like I wasted my whole day. It's not like I had anything else to do though. I'm at that point where I want to get back to keeping house, but I still need to be careful for a couple more weeks. Hopefully I will still have time to blog every once in a while when things get back to normal. I feel like my brain is in a fog and I don't have much to say today. Here are a few pictures from yesterday.

Loy reading his Bible.

Adam and Shellee making the video

Lights, camera, action!

Last night at Family Night Shellee and Adam made a goofy video.

Tubal Reversal Surgery Day 23

Feeling the same again. I'm really tired today though. Still needing 400 mg of ibuprofen every 5-6 hours.

I woke up to a light dusting of snow today. I love it. I had my friends Julie, Jennifer, and Marian over for our weekly rotating tea party. Each week we meet at each other's house and have tea, pray, and talk. In the summer we do fun activities like go for hikes, shop at garden stores, and one year we went on a lavender farm tour. All I did was set the table, the kitchen was still cluttered from Christmas boxes, and other things. My friends don't mind. We have known each other for 17 years now. We met at the first church Loy and I went to together after we were married. It's been a blessing to have friends who are Christians and have always been an encouragement and support. God has truly blessed me with good friends. I've known my friend Laura for 39 years now! We are more like sisters than friends. We grew up together. I wish I could see Laura as much as I get to see my other friends. Today we had our Christmas gift exchange. It was fun. I was very tired after meeting with them though. I read my new book "Housewives Desperate for God" and took a nap for a few hours. We are also having Family Night tonight. Here are some pictures of our tea party today and some pictures from past activities we have done.

I used the new tea set Loy gave me for Christmas

My tea pot full of earl gray tea

The morning sun looked pretty on the set table.

Julie with a bird ornament on her head. I have goofy friends!

Girl talk

17th Christmas together!

This is an old picture of us on our lavender farm tour.

Beautiful lavender fields

Jennifer, Marian, and Julie

This was taken at our old house, It was my birthday. This was one of the first times I let my hair grow out gray. I'm on my second time now and I will keep it gray this time. Loy likes my hair gray, and now that the old color is almost out, I like it too.

Here we are in Seattle on one of our trips together.

This was at the Street of Dreams home tour this last summer. We had fun!

Marian's birthday at my house last January.

Here we are at a nice tea restaurant. I think it was Julie or Jennifer's birthday. Notice the different tea pots on the table? We each had our own unique pot.

Lord thank you for my friends!

This is the first day of the rest of our lives! Tubal Reversal Surgery Recovery Day 22

I woke up singing today!

This is the day! This is the day! This is the day that the Lord has made!
Let us rejoice! Let us rejoice! Let us rejoice and be glad in it!
This is the day that the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it!
This is the day! This is the day! That the Lord has made!


Give thanks to the Lord!
Our God is good. Whose love endures forever.
Let all the children of Israel say:
God’s love endures forever.
The right hand of God has struck with power.
The right hand of God is exalted.
I shall not die, but I shall live and proclaim the works of the Lord!
The stone which the builders rejected has become the foundation of our house!
By the Lord has this been done.
How wonderful to behold!

From "31 Days of Praise" by Ruth Myers:

My heart rejoices in You, Lord, for You are my strong shelter in times of trouble and danger and stress, my hiding place to whom I continually resort...
My Father who lovingly provides for me...
My Shepherd who guides and protects me...
My Champion who upholds my cause as His child and defends my highest interests...
My Bridegroom who delights in me...
My God who is mighty to save, who rests in His love for me and rejoices over me with singing, with shouts of joy.
You are my inheritance, my share in life, the one who satisfies my longing soul and fills my hungry soul with goodness.
I sing for joy as I take refuge in the shadow of Your wings!


"He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, 'My refuge and my fortress, My God, in whom I trust!'"

Psalm 91:2


TO LIVE YOUR LIFE YOU MUST LOSE IT!

"He who has found his life shall lose it, and he who has lost his life for my sake shall find it."

Matthew 10:39

"If anyone wishes to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. For whoever wishes to save his life shall lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake and the gospel's shall save it. For what does it profit a man to gain the whole world, and forfeit his soul? For what shall a man give in exchange for his soul? For whoever is ashamed of Me and My words in this adulterous generation, the Son of Man will also be ashamed of him when He comes in the glory of His Father with the holy angels."

Mark 9:34-38

"He who loves his life loses it; and he who hates his life in this world shall keep it to life eternal."

John 12:25


Audio Adrenaline
"Get Down"
17th song down on my play list.

Lavishly our lives are wasted
Humbleness is left untasted
You can't live your life to please yourself, yeah
That's a tip from my mistakes
Exactly what it doesn't take
To win you've got to come in last place
To live your life you've got to lose it
And all the losers get a crown

[CHORUS:]
I get down and He lifts me up
I get down and He lifts me up
I get down and He lifts me up
I get down

All I need's another day
Where I can't seem to get away
From the many things that drag me down, yeah
I'm sure you've had a day like me
Where nothing seems to set you free
From the burdens you can't carry all alone
In your weakness He is stronger
In Your darkness He shines through
When you're crying He's your comfort
When you're all alone, He's carrying you

[CHORUS]
I get down and He lifts me up
I get down and He lifts me up
I get down and He lifts me up
I get down

This valley is so deep
I can barely see the sun
I cry out for mercy, Lord
You lift me up again

P.S.
Surgery recovery update. I feel the same. One funny little thing I have to tell you though, I have to write down when I take my ibuprofen every time or I'll forget if I took it or not!