Tomorrow's mighty oak is just today's nut that holds its ground.

I have been sooo tired lately and my brain is just in a fog. I have had no interest in blogging but my sister Debbie requested that I update my blog so everyone knows what is going on so here is my mess from my foggy brain Deb. Warning: Loy did not edit this so it's a mess. I used spellcheck though! Thank you Lord for spell check!

I feel like I've been holding my breath for 14 weeks! I am 14 weeks 5 days today and I don't really feel pregnant. I'm having symptoms and everything but I can still wear my same pants and they are comfortable. I don't feel like I'm growing. I've only gained 3 pounds in 14 weeks too. At around 7 weeks I thought I was having another miscarriage. I had spotting and some cramping. I thought that I was going to loose the baby but I had an ultrasound and the baby was the right size and had a heartbeat. They did find that I had a cyst on my ovary and a fibroid somewhere in my uterus. I had my 8 week appointment and my midwife did an ultrasound and the baby again was the right size and had a heartbeat. Then the longest 4 weeks I have ever had to wait slowly went by. I was very nervous at my 12 week appointment. That whole 4 weeks I had symptoms but did not feel anything happening in my belly. I don't mean movement from the baby or anything like that, I just don't feel anything. I would think by now I would feel a blob or a pressure or something. Well at my 12 week app. the moment my midwife put the Doppler on my belly a loud strong heartbeat came through. It was wonderful to hear. I waited 4 long weeks to see if this baby was still ok and all I got to hear was about 45 seconds of a heartbeat. Torture I tell you, torture! My midwife has to retire which is sad. He delivered David or Joey I can't remember which one but I had him as a midwife thorough both David and Joey. The person he recommended me to see was my sister Debbie's midwife and is currently my daughter in law Laura's midwife. I see her in 2 long weeks! Maybe I just cant believe I'm pregnant or maybe since it's been 14 years since I've been pregnant I just don't remember what it is like. I wasn't showing until 6 months with my first pregnancy but I'm older and fatter now. You would think I'd be showing at 8 weeks! Or maybe when you have a miscarriage it really affects you. It's hard to believe everything is ok. Over the last week there have been a few times that I thought I felt the baby move but it still doesn't make me feel pregnant! All my books say it's way too early to feel the baby move so I'm not sure, but it feels like what I remember from before. Debbie said she felt her baby early. I will know more in two weeks. I decided at my 12 week appointment to assume everything is ok unless i have signs of a miscarriage rather than everything in not ok because I don't feel pregnant. Most of the time I'm doing ok. I'll have a day here and there where I just worry and feel like something is not right. On those days I just have to pray and trust God that no matter what happens He is in control. I should be having an ultrasound in a few weeks too. Hopefully they will be able to tell if it is a girl or a boy.